Wardens of Archos Read online

  Every bone in Cale's body hurt. He’d been injured so many times since founding the Sparrows, but he couldn't remember a single time he’d been in this much pain.

  He flexed his fingers and stretched his legs, but the slow movements didn’t come easy. Weak as he was, it was an improvement.

  And he was awake. His fever dreams had stopped. He couldn't forget them soon enough, but he had a feeling the bloody images would stay with him for a while, long after the rest of his nightmares had faded into nothing.

  To his right, a door opened. It was a chore to turn his head, but he needn't have made the effort. He recognised her footsteps.

  “You're awake!” Rachael sat on the stool next to him. Her eyes were brimmed red, but she was smiling. “We were so worried. When you didn't show any sign of improvement we feared—How are you feeling?”

  He couldn't do this. There were so many things he wanted to say to her, but he wasn't sure it was still his place. He needed time to think, to recover. He didn't trust his mind or his voice while he was still weak.

  “Rachael. I’m—” Cale focused on the sheets. He hated building distance between them, but it was better that way. He couldn't stop now just because he'd been poisoned. “My queen, you’re kind to visit me. I’m sure you have more urgent matters to attend to.”

  His throat burnt with every word, but he would endure it if it meant talking to her.

  “Don’t do that.” The last time they talked, her words had been harsh. Now she just sounded sad and broken. He resisted the urge to reach out and hold her hand.

  Cale forced himself to look at her. “My queen, I'm afraid I don't—”

  “Don’t be so formal. Please? Can’t we talk as we’ve done before?”

  He wanted that more than anything. To be close to her again. To hold her when she needed comfort. But it wasn't that simple.

  He knew distancing himself was the right thing to do. But he wanted more, and he wasn't well enough to argue. “I didn't think you'd want to, after how I behaved. I’m sorry, Rachael. I shouldn’t have ignored you.” His voice was rough, and he coughed. The effort made him wheeze.

  Rachael got up and sat on his bed.

  “Why did you?”

  “Because I was getting in your way. You needed someone by your side who could protect you, not coddle you. I went easy on you, Rachael, and it could have cost you your life. Kiana doesn’t make the same mistakes I’ve made. She’s merciless. She's a better teacher for you than I was.”

  “I can look after myself, Cale.”

  “I know you can, which makes how I’ve acted even worse. I knew you could handle yourself, I saw how quickly you learned, and still I held back. I was so afraid of losing you that I wasn’t willing to put you into harm’s way. I thought if I could just keep you from getting hurt I could—” He hesitated, and took a deep breath in. “I’m sorry, Rachael. I should have been better. To you, to my family. I was weak, and they’re dead because of me.” He’d waited too long to say these words. Now that he had it didn’t bring relief, or a feeling of weightlessness, but he had confessed. Perhaps the relief would follow.

  “You couldn’t have known what would happen.”

  “But I should have foreseen it!” Rachael flinched. He hadn't expected his voice to be so sharp, given how he was feeling. “I’m sorry. Ailis always said I was too hard on myself, but how can I not be? I was their leader, Rachael. They trusted me to keep them safe, and I let them down. I should have been more careful. I was so determined to have my Sparrows ready to fight once the battle started, I didn’t think. I was so preoccupied with fulfilling the prophecy, I didn’t plan. I should have moved them to another hideout.”

  When Rachael took his hand in hers, he didn’t pull away. Maybe he didn’t deserve the comfort but he wanted it, even if it was only for a short moment.

  “Everyone makes mistakes. It's a human thing to do.”

  Cale closed his eyes and balled his free hand into a fist, crumpling the sheet he’d been holding.

  “I can’t afford to make mistakes. People die when I do. Good people, like my family. Like Ailis. It’s my fault they are gone. I appreciate what you’re trying to do, but there's nothing you can say to change what I've done. I’ve put your safety above all else, and now people are dead because of my miscalculation.”

  “I didn’t ask you to save me.”

  “I know, but it had to be you. I don’t regret bringing you here, Rachael, never doubt that. It’s every other decision I've made since that I regret.”

  “So that’s why you’ve been avoiding me?”

  He nodded. Rachael hesitated, her eyes distant. She was thinking. Cale smiled; he loved that look on her.

  “When I was in Blackrock and the White Guard was coming for me, who came to help me?”

  Cale frowned. “I did, but I didn’t go to—”

  “When I went to Aeron and put myself in danger, who came to help me?”

  “I did, but—”

  “When I said I wanted to learn how to fight, who trained me?”

  He sighed. Some of Kiana's stubbornness had rubbed off on her. “I did.”

  “You can regret how you trained me all you want, but if you hadn’t trained me at all I wouldn't have stood a chance against the White Guard or King Aeric. If you hadn’t come after me in Blackrock and found me when Aeron had me, I’d be dead. You’ve made mistakes and you can blame yourself for the rest of your life if you want, but the truth is this: If you hadn't been there, I’d be dead. Everyone makes bad decisions, Cale. I’m not proud of everything I’ve done here or in Blackrock, but I did what I thought was best, and so did you.”

  “That’s different, you—”

  “A few nights ago, nine assassins came to kill me.”

  He froze. “Assassins? Are you—”

  “Be quiet and let me finish.”

  He smiled, and squeezed her hand. He could listen to her for hours when she spoke with so much conviction, even if he didn't agree with everything.

  “Kiana fought them and insisted I stay out of her way. She was surrounded, so I stepped in. I was cut and poisoned, but because I moved Kiana had an opening. I’ll always have my scar, Cale, but I've earned that scar. We’re alive. I had to think and act fast, so I did. That’s what you do every day. The only difference is the amount of people depending on you. You’ve lost a lot of Sparrows and you lost Ailis and Arlo, but it’s only because you acted at all that some Sparrows survived. If you hadn’t done what you thought was best at the time, we’d all be dead now and King Aeric would be waging war against the gifted. You stood against a king manipulated by his commander and a deranged Mist Woman. Not many people are prepared to fight against such odds, but you did.”

  He hadn’t thought about it this way; it hadn’t occurred to him to consider anything but his failings. Was this how she saw him? Strong, no matter the odds. He didn’t care if it was proper or not. He held her hand because he wanted to.

  “Make sure you get all the rest you can today. I’m leaving for Midoka tomorrow morning. I’ll need you well enough to look after our Sparrows.”

  He grinned. Their Sparrows? He loved the sound of it. “As you wish, my—” He laughed when Rachael glared him into silence. It hurt every fibre in his body, but above the pain it felt good. “Rachael. I’m not letting you out of my sight again. Commander Dryden can take charge while we’re gone. I'll go where you go.”

  To see her return his smile banished the last of the poison’s lingering chill, and it was the best feeling yet. “Good. Don't ignore me again or I'll order you to spend time with me.”

  “I promise.”

  He was still grinning when the door closed behind her.

  Rachael leaned against the cool stone surface of the palace walls outside the healer’s chambers, and willed her heart to calm down. It felt good to joke with Cale again, to talk as they had done before. She wanted him in her life. If he still left her later and it broke some naive part of her, she would deal with it the
n. Right now, she needed him to stay.

  Since she had overheard his conversation with Aeron that night, he’d been an unshakable rock. Unshakable in his belief, and unshakable in his strength. Cale had made the hard decisions most people weren’t prepared to make. He took each loss personally. He was allowed time to grieve, but she wouldn’t allow it to destroy him. Cale needed to move on, and if she needed to throw him back into the action she would. She hadn’t planned on saying as much as she had, but Cale had needed to hear it. Seeing his old smile at the end of it was worth the speech she had made.

  “That was quite something, Rachael,” said Kiana, and stepped out of the shadows to lean against the wall next to Rachael. “I can’t believe I fell for it when you said you hate giving speeches. You’re a natural.”

  “I’ve never seen him so defeated. Has he ever reacted to a loss like this?”

  “No, but we've never lost this many people in one night.”

  “And what do the Sparrows think? Do they blame him?”

  Kiana hesitated. “They miss their loved ones and their friends, but they know he did everything he could. You said it yourself, he was up against a crazy Mist Woman. No one could have known what she was thinking. We know he didn’t leave us exposed on purpose.”

  “But you’re angry.”

  Kiana sighed. “Not with him. We trust him to make the hard decisions. He's good at it, it's why we follow him. I couldn’t have done what he did. There were so many things that could have gone wrong, so many variables that could have gone either way.” Kiana grinned. “I might have given you a real enemy instead of some hay bales. But more than anything we needed you to live, and get to King Aeric. We all knew the odds, and we followed him anyway. None of us expected to survive, but some of us did. Not all of us were in the hideout. He always insisted some Sparrows stay at home, or go to another shelter. Just in case.” Kiana twirled her dagger through her fingers, her eyes focused on a spot on the floor. She’d performed the movement so many times Rachael thought she’d have been able to do it in her sleep without cutting herself.

  “Maybe he should have moved us farther away from the city, but then we might not have made it to the fight in time, and you could have died as a result. I'm not sure it matters. Aeron must have known where we were. She would have found us halfway across the country, too, and we’d still be dead. At least this way some of us could join the fight, and those of us who died did so surrounded by friends and family. Not many people are so lucky.”

  Rachael hadn't thought of it that way. She had always assumed she’d die alone, starved in a back alley. Having Kiana and Cale with her in her last moments seemed nicer.

  “Can you speak to Cale?”

  Kiana nodded. “I’m just waiting for Lon and Oren, they’ve got a few words for him, too.”

  “Are you ready to leave tomorrow?”

  Kiana frowned. “I am. I’m concerned about Kaida’s intentions, Rachael. She’s sending you into the open arms of a coven of Mist Women. I don’t trust her, and neither should you.”

  “You think she’s doing it just to kill me? Why not kill me here? She’s had enough chances.”

  “I don’t know what’s going on in her head. Is it so crazy to think she only wanted to gain your trust to lure you to Midoka? Maybe there’s a ritual they need your blood for. You could be walking into a trap.”

  Rachael hated how much sense Kiana made. If Kiana was right, then she was simply trading one enemy for another. But if Kaida was right, then she had a chance of protecting herself against the demons. Was it not her responsibility to forge new alliances? Relationships between the South and Rifarne had been shaky for years. She had an opportunity to fix that. There was a possibility she wouldn’t be safe in Midoka, but she wasn’t safe here, either. She grew more paranoid with every minute Arnost Lis was hiding. The Tramuran Ambassador had disappeared, and Rachael couldn’t shake the feeling he was watching her from the shadows. She was itching to leave Rifarne to get away from him. Would he follow her to a country where magic was part of life? What did he hate more—her or the gift?

  “I want to trust Kaida,” Rachael said. “But I agree she’s hiding something. Keep an eye on her.”

  “Always. And if we're walking into a trap, they’ll have to kill me before they can sacrifice you.”

  “Thank you.”

  Lon and Oren walked around the corner, broad grins on their faces.

  “Let’s go shake some sense into that man!” Lon punched his open palm with his fist.

  “Don't shake him too hard, I need him well enough to travel tomorrow.”

  Kiana returned their grins, and together they marched into the infirmary.

  Their smiles were infectious. While Rachael had nothing to compare it to, they were the closest thing to a family she’d ever had and she would fight to keep them safe.

  Chapter Twenty

  Rachael had worn her entire filth-ridden wardrobe at once in Blackrock. Now her wardrobe was a real thing made of dark oak, filled with satins and lace and silks. For the first time in her life, Rachael had things to pack. Elyn advised her which dresses to take, which colours would be favoured in Midoka, and what the weather was likely to be now. The only thing she had chosen for herself was the tome of Ar’Zac Dar; it was too valuable to be left behind, and she’d wrapped it in cloths at the bottom of a bag to hide it.

  Kiana watched from the middle of Rachael’s bed with a satisfied grin on her face.

  “I knew we'd make a lady out of you yet.”

  Rachael stood still as Elyn held another dress to her, this one a bright green. “If you enjoy it so much, maybe Elyn should dress you.”

  “I already dress perfectly for every occasion. It's impossible to fight three assassins at once when you're wearing a skirt like that. Unless Elyn has a way of getting me out of my leather faster, I’m not interested.” Kiana winked, and Elyn blushed.

  “Trousers will be fine for me as well, Elyn. I won't be attending any feasts where I'm going.” Rachael frowned. “Will I?”

  Kiana shrugged. “I don't think so, but I've never visited a coven of witches before. Maker knows what their traditions are.”

  “Are you sure you don't wish to take any formal gowns?” Elyn asked. It had taken some convincing, but Rachael had managed to stop Elyn from calling her queen or lady. Rachael wanted to be able to relax in her own rooms. She couldn't do that if Elyn insisted on titles.

  “I'm sure. A few pairs of trousers and shirts will do. I won't need a change of shoes.”

  “I think you should take that dark-red dress,” said Kiana.

  Rachael scowled at the fabric. “That one was too tight.”

  “It’s not too tight, you’re just not used to corsets. You looked great in it. You should take it and wear it if you and Cale get a quiet moment.”

  Rachael blushed. She was glad they were talking again, but beyond that—she felt awkward considering anything beyond that. She was happy to have her friend back. Couldn't that be enough?

  “I don't think he'd be impressed if I fainted because I can't breathe.”

  Kiana grinned. “I'm sure he'd be happy to help you out of it.”

  Elyn cleared her throat, her face as red as the dress. “I will take my leave, if we're done. Please let me know if you require anything more from me.”

  “Thank you, Elyn. I appreciate the help.” Rachael fought the urge to ask Elyn to pack the tight red dress after all.

  Elyn curtsied, and left the room.

  Rachael looked forward to a night of undisturbed sleep, but she might not get one until she’d left the country. Cale had placed guards inside her room in addition to the ones outside her door, in case Arnost Lis tried to get in through the windows again. Rachael hated being watched, but she couldn’t argue. The Tramuran ambassador had proven his ruthlessness, and he now knew Kiana and she could defeat nine skilled assassins. Would he send even more next time? How many did he have left?

  Tonight, Oren was one of the guards insi
de her room. Commander Dryden himself guarded the door. Cale was worried Arnost Lis had heard of her plans to leave Rifarne, and would attack tonight. Rachael was just grateful to know two of her protectors. She still didn't like it, but she'd sleep easier than with strangers watching over her bed.

  A knock came at her door followed by Commander Dryden entering her room, his fist clutched to his heart.

  “My queen, you have a visitor.”

  Rachael sighed. All she wanted was some sleep.

  “Who is it?”

  “Lady Nerine of Krymistis. Would you like me to send her away?”

  Rachael straightened. She’d hoped to have a moment to speak with Lady Nerine, but hadn’t thought she’d get a chance now she was leaving in the morning.

  “I'll stay until you're alone,” said Kiana, and Rachael nodded. She doubted the Krymistian lady was conspiring with the Tramuran ambassador, but she was grateful she wasn't alone.

  “Send her in.” Rachael turned to her Sparrows. “Leave us, please.”

  They nodded, bowed, and left her room.

  Lady Nerine was as beautiful and as elegant as Rachael remembered. She wore her title with as much confidence as she wore her dress and her crown. Next to her, Rachael’s own inadequacy nagged her.

  Lady Nerine smiled, but Rachael was surprised to see her bow. Rachael returned the gesture, all too aware she lacked the grace Lady Nerine wore like a birthright.

  “Please, I'm a guest in your quarters,” said Lady Nerine. “It would be rude of me not to offer you at least some basic courtesies.”

  “What can I do for you?” Rachael asked and sat on her bed. Lady Nerine took a seat opposite her by the mirror.

  “I apologise for the late intrusion. I’ve come with an offer I hope you will accept.”

  “What kind of offer?”

  “Rumour has it you will be leaving for Midoka in the morning. I offer you a place aboard my ship tonight, and safe passage.”

  “Who told you?” Her plans weren't common knowledge. She had accepted Arnost Lis would spy on her, but she’d hoped it would remain a secret otherwise.